Plagued by dreams
Ok, so I had another dream last night and this one, while scary to me because it involved something I'm jumpy around, wasn't notable due to it's scarific factor. It is notable for an entirely different reason that I'll make note of shortly. First, the dream:
I'm upstairs. Our real house is our dream house (this will change later). Bly is in the bonus room over the garage and direcly adjacent to that in the hallway, where the "laundry nook" is, I am standing. It's kind of dark in the bonus room. Flickering light, that sort of thing. The WonderPug is with his mommy. I am facing the washing machine and looking up to the point where the ceiling meets the wall. In the corner there is a plate sized hole that leads to the attic. Minor modifications to our real house begin. The hole, the way the stairs run down to the ground level in a turn rather than a straight line, the rot and wet stains at the top of the walls from where I've done this before. I stand with a bottle of bug spray in my hand. I am shirtless and wearing boxer shorts. I am scanning the area for any signs of life. On the outside I am a strong hunter, but on the inside I am anxious. I know something is going to happen when I unleash the stream of chemical from the can. Over to my right, both directly above and off to the side of the bonus room door I can see where the wall is stained from the last time I sprayed. Streaks run down the wall and at the top the ceiling and drywall has eroded away with rot. You can see studs and drywall racks in the spaces. I press the button and a stream of cloudy liquid covers everywhere I look. I follow along the apex of the wall with a precision matched only by laser beams. I follow this path until I come to where the hole to the attic is. It's darker now and flickering light from the bonus room makes my movements look choppy and slow. I raise the can and spray around the hole and, against my better judgement, up into the hole. For a brief second nothing happens, and then, just as I'm satisfied that all is well a huge brown spider the size of a fist crawls rapidly down the wall. It is angry. I spray it directly, praying now that what I know is true really isn't. Direct hit. The spider explodes in 10,000 directions at once and I groan. Baby spiders cover the walls upset that I disturbed their mother. Upset that I knocked them out of their slumber. The mother spider looks smaller now. She dies. The babies crawl and jump around all over towels; all over the dryer and the washer. All over the walls. I spray all of them in turn creating a flood of poison. A monsoon of death. When my task is done Bly walks past me into the bedroom and I look into the bonus room which is now more like an unfinished room, cavernous and cobwebby; forgotten. There is a bat hanging from the ceiling but it is stuck for some reason. It's wings flap so fast; physically impossible fast. The bat's feet are stuck to the ceiling but I can't tell why. I'm not worried about it, though.
Fin
This is what I wake up to. This is what was going through my head right before I woke up this morning. I like nightmares. I really do. They are interesting and fun. This one wasn't particularly bad anyway. I don't like spiders but I don't fear them as long as they don't surprise me by dropping on my head or scurrying across my leg at inopportune times. The notable bit of this dream is that a long while ago I remember dreaming about spraying the area I spray in this most recent dream. I remember watching the spray drip down the walls leaving trails that stained. My question is this: Is it possible that in this most recent dream I actually did remember another dream I had? Is it possible to remember events from a different (past) dream in a new (current) dream? I've dreamt the same dream before. I've even recognized that it was the same dream while dreaming, but it didn't feel like this. Did I, in the current dream, dream that I had a different, past dream in which I sprayed the walls and so in the current dream it felt like I was remembering or did I really have a different, past dream in which I sprayed the walls? You have no idea how confusing this is. I remember having a dream a while back in which I sprayed the walls and this current dream seems to indicate a passage of time by the rot on the walls from where I sprayed a long time ago. It would even take a while for so much rot to occur. Is my dream life progressing in real time? Am I creating memories by fake-remembering in current dreams? If I never had a spray dream in the past, but I think I did because I got the impression of remembering a dream where I sprayed upon waking up from this dream, then I have created a memory of a past spray dream. This is hard to explain.
Am I a butterfly dreaming I'm a man or am I a man dreaming I'm a butterfly?
I think too much.
posted by Russell @ 8:32 AM
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